How Star Trek Changed my Attitude about Love in Quarantine
Updated: Apr 19, 2020
I'm in our 1,000 square foot house with my favorite goofball. I’m thrilled to have my man around but we collide like asteroids and the repetitious feeling of groundhog day has been rough. We get under each other’s skin and know exactly what launch codes to use in war.
I leave dirty dishes in the sink; he leaves half-used napkins on the counter. Apparently I talk too much; he disturbs my sleep by snoring.
Tit for tat.
This week, I jolted awake from his snoring. In my half-conscious state of mind, I actually thought about nailing him with a pillow, instead of gently turning his face away. At the time, striking him as hard as I could with a pillow seemed a logical response and appropriate action. Yet now, the underlying anger startles me and I know I’ve lost it while he soundly sleeps.
I see it all over social media too. Passive aggressive memes and videos highlighting the worst habits of spouses, children, loved ones. Some people are losing it! I giggle because there is some relatable truth, but now I wonder if it’s the wrong message. Maybe it’s a privilege to be home safe with the ones we love.
Recently, a TV episode challenged me to choose a better quarantine attitude, especially with my husband. Enter Star Trek.
Who would have thought a silly sci-fi show would smack me with a reality check?
We watch this crazy sci-fi series together. I find it hokie and slow at times – in fact, I get annoyed with the “quantum physics, futuristic engineering practices” and geek speak. Yet, I endure because to him it’s nostalgic. It takes him back to childhood and the good times discussing moral decisions with his family.
Since it is special to him, I can certainly sit through 45 minutes of space aliens and “cutting-edge” special effects (like 20 years ago). Now, I will never say that I love the series, however I will admit to developing an appreciation for his beloved Star Trek.
The last episode we watched replays in my mind. Danger, drama, love – circumstances I can appreciate and relate to now in quarantine. This particular episode concluded with an impactful point of view on being stranded. I’ll spare you the geek speak…
Picture this: A man and woman stranded on an uncharted planet. Not lovers, nor acquaintances, these two friends must work together to survive. Longing for a way home, the woman resolves herself to finding a way off while her compadre spends his time improving their living conditions.
Over time, the wilderness becomes labored land, tilled for romance to blossom. Sweating together, surviving a horrible storm, dreaming of a boat to explore the river… with each day, their bond grows.
And yet she resists his help. Everything he does to protect or provide makes her believe he’s given up hope of returning home.
After a few uneasy encounters, the woman sits down with him to DTR. Prepared to outline strict boundaries, the woman is caught off guard by the man. Instead of discussing the obvious growing attraction, the man eloquently tells her about his decision to focus on making life easy for her, anticipating her needs, and in doing so, finds peace.
This reminder that love and peace can be found even in drastic situations is what I need now. It’s what our marriage needs in quarantine.
What does your marriage need?
What do your relationships need?
What reminder of hope do you need?
What truth do you need to remember?
What seeds of love do you need to plant?
PS - For any Star Trek fans, or those interested in this beautiful story, you can enjoy (or appreciate) the same episode we watched: Voyager Season 2 Episode 25: Resolutions
Live long and prosper, Rebels!